THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS.

When I was choosing my Adaptation Appreciation books at the end of last year, Peter Heller’s The Dog Stars was in the running, purely off of the movie’s star power. I loved all three of the upcoming film’s leads and figured that, with Ridley Scott at the helm, this adaptation could hit pretty hard. I eventually sidestepped The Dog Stars book in favor of some different 2026 releases (like Project Hail Mary, one of the best books I’ve ever read), but the movie still intrigued me. Morgan and I headed to the theater at peak times—4:00pm on a Wednesday—to see if Ridley still had the sauce. I’m not sure he did, but traces of sauce were detected, I think.

For the first two-thirds of the movie, The Dog Stars was content to play way too by-the-book. Rarely did it feel like I was seeing something I hadn’t seen before in another post-apocalyptic movie before. That was mostly to the movie’s detriment—I was kind of bored just watching the characters walk around a deserted Colorado—but it also meant that I wasn’t turned off by some boneheaded story choice early on. Jacob Elordi, Jasper and company (take a shot every time Elordi says, “Come on, Jasper”—you’ll be blackout drunk in no time) kept the wandering engaging, but I was waiting for something big to happen in between aerial shots of the gorgeous Rockies and accompanying landscape. The fireworks appeared eventually, and man, were they blindingly bright on arrival.

Whether it was the author’s decision or Ridley Scott’s, the final third of The Dog Stars was high-intensity to the point of exhaustion. I can admit I had a good time with some of the big set pieces and heaps of marauders and tricksters, but they came way too fast and furious to possibly enjoy each one individually. The variety of violent gangs in the film’s final sequences also begged the question: “Where were they the whole time?”. We the viewer watched Jacob Elordi face no significant threat for weeks and then, in a matter of minutes, every large-scale attack in the story came his way. While the intensity was welcome, pacing seemed to be an issue. I quite enjoyed the Grand Junction sequence, though, and Allison Janney gave the single best performance of the movie in her three or so minutes of screen time. That woman commits 100% no matter the role, and I respect the hell out of her for it.

With plenty of entertaining moments and a trio of actors whose recent roles I’ve really liked (especially my queen Margaret Qualley), The Dog Stars should’ve been a hit. I had a decent enough time at the movies, but this movie’s staying power was being tested the moment Morgan and I left the theater as we asked each other, “What was the lesson here? What did the characters learn?”. It seemed weird that Ridley Scott couldn’t deliver a clear theme in this blockbuster when he’s been able to do so many times in his career. While The Dog Stars obviously didn’t stack up to the greats of Scott’s filmography—Gladiator, The Martian, and Thelma and Louise, for me—he’s had more uneven films, though if I’m being honest, he may have lost his touch. Between this, Gladiator II, and Napoleon (which I didn’t even finish because I got so bored), Ridley’s best films seem to almost certainly be behind him.